Songs on the roof
by Origo Mali
Summary: Kikumaru sneaks up on Fuji and overheads him on the rooftop. KikumaruFuji


Title: Just worrying

Pairing: Dream Pair!

Rating: 14-A . . . that's as high as it gets I'm afraid, sorry, was trying for higher

Warning: . . . . BL? SONG FIC! crap! Angsty too.

Summary: Eiji sneaks up on Syusuke and overheads him on the rooftop.

Disclaimer: I am a poor Canadian, I couldn't own it if I tried. The song, Zakuro (pomegranate) is property of Dir en Grey, and if you haven't heard it then you really should because it is a really amazing song and its really soothing to listen to. So what are you doing here reading this? Go download it! prods

A/N: ok, this points to fic, is crappy. I'm warning you. Now, for a little thing I should mention and you should know before reading. I left the lyrics in there _original_ state, that means they are in Japanese! I think it's better this way as that's how they are sung. There are translations of what he is saying in the fic - never fear - I just wanted to keep the lyrics in there original format that's all. Just a heads up. ((all Japanese is in romanji and the translation for the song was done by . . . uh . . . I can't remember .;; but it wasn't me ))

Walking up the stairs quietly, Eiji knew where he would find his best friend. He smiled to himself as he opened the door to the schools roof and walked out into the bright afternoon light. He let the door close behind him as he breathed in the fresh warm air that moved quite nicely through his hair. Eiji closed his eyes for a quick moment, enjoying the sensation, before opening them to start to scan the rooftop for his friend.

Eiji's smile widened when he spotted Syusuke lying down on the far side of the roof. Eiji knew he wasn't sleeping, but he knew that Syusuke wouldn't hear him coming. Syusuke was listening to his music again, up here where he wouldn't be disturbed. He always did this when he could. Eiji thought it was a cute habit of his, though he really didn't tell Syusuke that. Eiji could see the glint of sunlight reflected of Syusuke's large headphones as he approached. Eiji wanted a pair of can's just like Syusuke's, they were just so cool!

Eiji snuck up from behind Syusuke, careful not to block the sunlight so Syusuke wouldn't know he was there, he was gonna try and break his record. The last time he had done this, it had taken Syusuke two minutes before looking up at him and acknowledging his presence. Eiji didn't know if that's how long it took him to notice that he was there or if that was as long as Syusuke felt comfortable just having Eiji staring at him. He had a feeling it was the later unfortunately.

Eiji sat down and started to watch his friend, idly pondering what Syusuke was listening too. Syusuke was bobbing his head slightly in tune with the music that only he could hear and his lips started to move, just barely mouthing out the words that no doubt went along with the song. Eiji gave a slight chuckle at the sight of his friend but then grew silent watching his friends lips slowly moth out words that only he knew.

He loved watching Syusuke doing this, he probably didn't even know that he did. His soft lips would just move so slowly, sensually curving around each syllable. Sometimes Syusuke would hum along or even occasionally sing. Those moments were few and far between, but those where the moments he loved the most. Syusuke's voice was always so tranquil and subdued, it always had a calming effect on Eiji.

"Koe wo dashite sakenda, anata no name. Kitto todokanai wa ne, watashi no koe sae mo. Demo ne, ima wa sore demo watashi wa ii no. Itsuka, kokoro no naka de anata wo "

Eiji was caught off guard at first, but smiled at Syusuke's voice, he hadn't heard him ever sing this song before. He didn't recognize the lyrics. _A voice screaming out, your name_._ Surely it will not reach you, my voice_. _But, for now, I am okay, someday, in my heart, you will.._ Eiji wanted to reach out and lace his fingered into Syusuke's light brown strands of hair that shifted lightly in the breeze. Though he refrained knowing that Syusuke would stop singing if he did that. After a moment Syusuke continued.

"Yume wo konya mo miru wa, anata no yume wo. Makura no shita ni oita, anata no tegami no sei." Syusuke's voice seemed to fade off at some parts then it would come back again, Eiji thought it gave a little something to the words, "Yume wa zankoku sugite, iki ga togire itsumo gozen yojihan. Kurushiku me ga sameru wa."

Eiji's smile then turned slightly sad as he listened to what his friend was singing. _Tonight, too, I will dream, a dream of you. Beneath my pillow I placed, your letter. My dream is too cruel, my breathing interrupted always, at 4:30am. I awaken in pain._ Eiji didn't know if he liked the song that much anymore, it was sad. It was pretty, but Eiji didn't like it when Syusuke sang sad things. Syusuke continued to sing though as Eiji made no attempt to stop him.

"Toki wa naga sugite. Toki wa tsura sugite. Yume wa tomaranai. Ai wa kogoete yuku no. Hieta yoru, konna ni nagai yoru ni wa." Syusuke's voice faltered for a moment before he continued on with the song, making Eiji want to reach out again for him but for some reason he resisted again. _The time is too long. The time is too painful. The dream will not stop. My love is frozen, dead. On this cold evening, so, in this long night._ Eiji was compelled to let Syusuke finish this time, "Ishiki ga chigirete, konagona ni natte, omoide wo chirashi. Anata no yubiwa, nigirishimeru hodo ni, namida ga makura wo nurasu."

Syusuke's voice cracked, it looked almost like he was going to cry. Eiji could feel tears prickling at the backs of his eyes, but he didn't let anything become of them yet. Syusuke swallowed and continued to sway with the music. What Syusuke was singing was breaking Eiji's heart._ My consciousness is torn apart, becoming tiny pieces, my memories scattering. Your ring, I grasp it as tightly as I can, my tears soaking my pillow._

Syusuke looked like he was trying to sing more of the song, but none of the words where coming out of his mouth. He gently ran his fingers over his wrist as he attempted to get the words to come out of his mouth but it was impossible for him to get them out. After a little bit Eiji could see the tears shimmering in Syusuke's eyelashes, though they hadn't started to fall yet. Finally Syusuke got the last word of a line out, though it sounded strained, "Anata . . ."

_You . . ._

Eiji sat there for a moment looking at how pained his friends face was, suddenly he didn't want Syusuke to finish what he was singing. He wanted to reach over and pull Syusuke close to himself and hold him tight. Though just as he reached his hand out Syusuke started the last bit of the song. Eiji felt his finger tips just graze a few strands of hair as his hand feel short, unable to stop him.

"Watashi wa kowareru, tegami moyashi, hai ni naru, hai ni naru, hai ni naru. Watashi wa kowareru, kokoro kowashi, hai ni naru, hai ni naru, hai ni naru. Watashi wa kowareru. Anata wo nakushi. Ai shiteru.Ai shiteru. Ai shiteru.Watashi wa kowareru, tegami moyashi, hai ni naru, hai ni naru, hai ni naru. Watashi wa kowareru, kokoro kowashi, hai ni naru, hai ni naru, hai ni naru. hai ni naru, hai ni naru, hai ni naru. Watashi wa-"

_I am broken, the letter burnt, becoming ashes, becoming ashes, becoming ashes. I am broken, my heart broken, becoming ashes, becoming ashes, becoming ashes. I am broken, I lost you, I love you, I love you, I love you. I am broken, the letter burnt, becoming ashes, becoming ashes, becoming ashes. I am broken, my heart broken, becoming ashes, becoming ashes, becoming ashes. Becoming ashes. Becoming ashes. Becoming ashes. I am-_

The tears that Syusuke had been holding back where now rolling down his cheeks. Eiji couldn't watch any longer and moved to lay down beside his friend while wrapping his arms around him tightly. Syusuke opened his cerulean eyes in astonishment, he had no idea that anyone was their, he knew it was Eiji but still the presence of the other surprised him. Eiji buried his face into Syusuke's hair and pulled him closer. In response Syusuke wrapped his arms around Eiji and snuggled into the redheads chest.

Eiji gently pulled the head phones off of Syusuke and kissed him on the forehead. Eiji knew what this was all about, Syusuke was getting himself worked up over something again, an anxiety attack. It was a horrible habit of his that Eiji was dead set on someday correcting. But for now he was just going to have to settle with having to cuddle and love his boyfriend and best friend until all the anxiety went away. Though it wasn't as if he minded anyway.

Eiji smiled gently and looked down into Syusuke's open eyes, "You know you should try and play something happier when your down, it might make you feel better."

Syusuke just smiled at him and shock his head, "happy things only make me more depressed. You're the only thing that makes me happy again Eiji."

Eiji giggled at the brunettes reply, "I don't know if I should be happy or sad about that."

Before Syusuke had the chance to continue on with their light bantering, Eiji clammed his mouth in a hot passionate kiss. Syusuke moaned and tightened his hold on Eiji's shirt, pulling the redhead closer. Eiji ran his tongue over Syusuke's lips before quickly slipping inside his eager mouth. After a few moments, Eiji released Syusuke, allowing both of them to come up for air.

"Now stop going off alone and getting worked up over little things, Syu-kun." Eiji chided warmly, smile plastered onto his face, "Just come find me and I will make them go away."

Syusuke smiled, looking up into Eiji's deep royal blue eyes, giggling he responded, "well then I guess you are just going to have to spend the night at my house and make sure they stay away for good now aren't you?"

Eiji grinned roguishly at the implied meaning behind Syusuke's words before rolling on top of the smaller boy. Still smirking devilishly he once again trapped Syusuke into a fierce lip lock before breathing into his ear, "Oh I think I will . . ."


End file.
